How’s it going?
Very well thank you.
You’re writing for this site because your primary goal in life didn’t work out. What was it?
The above statement isn’t true. I’ll let you know when I have achieved it.
What were you like at school?
I was utterly tedious but on the right track.
What is your all time favourite
a) Album? ‘Electric Warrior’ by T.Rex. Honestly.
b)Film? I cannot decide between Koen Mortier’s ‘Ex Drummer’ and Charlie Kaufman’s ‘Synecdoche New York’.
c) Book? It has to be ‘Mr.Sammler’s Planet’ by Saul Bellow.
d) Sitcom? ‘I’m Alan Partridge’
What’s your most treasured material possession?
My DAB Radio. I couldn’t live without it.
What is the single best item of clothing you’ve ever owned?
A pair of brown leather boots that had a grainy 1960’s photograph of Borussia Dortmund printed on to the soles.
Who is your favourite sportsperson ever?
Without a shadow of a doubt it has to be Mr Richard Whiting. He can play in every position on the field and if he could run he would be the greatest Rugby League player this country has ever produced.
Other than property, what is the most expensive thing you’ve ever bought?
I honestly can’t remember. I once had a habit of buying vintage bass guitars and then selling them on at a fraction of the price when times were hard. The aforementioned leather boots were very expensive too and I have splashed out on some very nice over coats.
What’s your poison?
Who is the funniest person you’ve ever met?
Dr Steven Burwood
Pick five words to describe yourself.
Has there ever been a period in your life that you look back on and think “What the hell was I doing?”
I spent some time flirting with Theravada Buddhism. It really doesn’t work.
What’s in your pockets right now?
My mobile phone and a return train ticket to Goole.
Can you dance?
I genuinely believe that I can.
Vinyl, Tape, CD or MP3?
I would like to say Vinyl but I own very few these days. MP3 is how I listen to music now so I’ll have to go with that.
What are you most likely to complain about in a hotel?
I can’t imagine there ever being a time when I would complain about something in a Hotel. I do get very disappointed when I draw back the curtains to find an inadequate view.
What characteristics do you think you’ve inherited from your parents?
I have my father’s temperament and my mother’s love of Dory Previn.
What’s your most unpleasant characteristic?
My partner informs me that I am grouchy when I’m hungry.
What’s your culinary speciality?
Prawn and chorizo omelette with Waldorf salad.
What single non-political thing winds you up the most?
People that wander aimlessly around supermarkets whilst speaking into their mobile phones and get in my way.
What’s your greatest fear?
What music would you have played at your funeral?
I really don’t care but if pushed I would say ‘I know it’s Over’ by The Smiths.
What do you see when you look in the mirror?
The twinkle of the odd grey hair and the faintest of crow’s feet around sparkling blue eyes and I love it.
Recite a line of the greatest lyric ever written.
‘Out of sorrow entire worlds have been built.
Out of longing great wonders have been willed’.
‘(Are You) The One That I’ve Been Waiting For’. Nick Cave.
Enjoying Sunday mornings more than Saturday nights.
What are your plans for this weekend?
The BBC’ coverage of the Round Four of The Challenge Cup and ‘The Complete Novels of George Orwell’, I am up to ‘Coming Up For Air’.
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